"Something is not right with you dude"

"Something is not right with you dude" (said to SF, after the first quote post)

Hampton: "Don't be fooled- all these 'beard guys' are really Hipster Emos underneath. I might have to start confiscatin' beards."
SF: "Oh you mean like when the Skinheads used to razor blade punk kids' laces to steal their steel-toed Docs? You gonna start carrying cordless clippers around?"
Hampton: "Exactly- Lots of Emo kids walking around with beards these days"

"Best thing about this bike? The tank badges also work as fork stops"

"He won't like those bolts. They don't have any patina on them"

SF: "Shredded wheat shreds."
Hampton: "Says right on the box"

"We're reminded we're WT by the school my son goes to. It's all bitches in track suits and fake jugs"

"He was like 'I can't do this beat for 5 minutes!!' He was getting all mad, gettin' that Fader anger out"

"I need to make a sissy bar dude"

SF: "I hate ACDC"
Hampton: "You're fuckin' fucked up dude!"

"Somethin's not right with yo ass Spalds"

"You're gonna ruin Chubby Chaser. She's gonna start bringing in granola and yarn"

"Like when I cut my daughter's umbilical cord- it squirted shit all over the Doctor's face"

"The 400 dollar torque wrench can't compete with my pythons"

"I'm about to get balls deep on Brad's Bonnevilles"

"This is straight 1986 skate boarding right here. Except the label is too new and it would be a glass jar with a metal top. Nachos would be next"

"The dumbest thing that guy said was 'You know anyone looking for an Iron Head?' Usually you only get one when somebody dies and gives it to you"

"Sorry about the side-titty call. That goes against fat-guy ettiquette."

"Some dudes just don't make good fat guys"

Hampton: "Does your mom know you hump chicks in the butt?"
SF: "I don't know. I guess I could ask her"

"I never fuckin' go to Norm's dude!"

Get The Cookies. Hampton Edition

"You're fuckin' crazy! Both you motherfuckers"

"I don't eat Euro cookies dude"

"I look like a hillbilly in a flannel"

"I look like fuckin' Santa in a red flannel dude"

"What the fuck are you eating now? Yarn?"

"I'm sick of this fuckin Honda!!"

"Oh fuck! Look what I found!! Rice Crispy Treat"

"We should make an RTL Bathroom check in on Facebook"

"You've been hanging out with too many kitty-cats and eating yarn"

"Fuckin cats sleep all day, then you go to bed and it's a mosh pit"

"I went scuba diving once, but I got scared"

"Come on Spalds you're jammin' me up! I'm about to drop one!"

"Ballmetal was still in the Hansons when this came out"

"I liked Youth of Today when they still cussed"

"You didn't get dumped, you got cheated on. There's enough cock to go around"

"We can't get Barry to play the organ dude"

Hampton: "He's from Buffalo like Larry.
SF: "I don't know what that means"
Hampton: "It means he's from Hesperia dude"

"You definitely got something wrong with you Spalds"

"Have you ever took it out and pooh starts flyin?"

SF: "The wind keeps blowing the dirt in here"
Hampton: "It blew Brett in"

"If she wants her butt plugged she knows where to come dude"

SF: "How about some trail mix?"
Hamper: "That shit's kryptonite dude"

"Hey don't worry about it white man"

"I was puttin' creamers in and this dude's staring at me-- I'm like 'I know this shit's gay'.... I shoulda got myself one"

"Crunch some of these Hav-a-chips up and use on that salad like croutons"

"There's so much shit wrong with those bikes, I'm running out of room to write it down"

"It always comes around with buttholes with you dude"

"When you build a bike with 3 different types of bolts, it's like playin' the game Memory. Or a Rubik's Cube"

"See if you can get tickets to Monster Jam..... Kids wanna go"

"So you're telling me if I was single, I'd have chicks buying me cookies and shit?"

"Dudes think diets are a complicated mystery. Instead of eating cookies, eat nuts!"

"You don't gotta worry about that container of cookies anymore dude"

"Tell that chubby chaser she isn't allowed in here unless she's got cookies and candy"

"She ain't goin' to Sims with cookies and candy bars dude!"

"You can't claim Grand Terrace unless you've done a stage dive off the piano"

"Fat guy's gotta eat"

"That's hippie candy dude"

"That's all beard hair in that hair brush"

"I wanna do a band with Erba"

"You want some real rock n roll on? I mean real, not that emo shit"

"Man people are fuckin' weird around here"

"I've never done so much nr work ever"

"I hate when they turn the Haunted Mansion into that Nightmare whatever. Shit's gay"

"These chicks don't know me cuz I'm not driving around in a BMW"

"Did I ever tell you when I got in a fight at the Lynyrd Skynyrd concert at the fair. But I got a better one when I got in a fight at Bob Seger with my mom there and my mom and wife fought some chick"

"Keep your toys off my toolbox this ain't no chopping block"

"That was a gooood burrito dude. A seafood one with spinach and shit"

"What the fug is this music. Space music??"

"Lohman needs to take his bike home. Tell him John Joseph rode it in Purple Rain"